Previous
Questions and Answers
If two people are
immoral together, are they married?
If two people (are unfaithful
and know someone else intimately) outside of marriage, and then don't want anything to do
with each other. Are they forbidded to marry? Doesn't Paul say that the union is what
makes 2 one flesh?
Having a physical relationship of an immoral nature
may be considered, in a sense, as making the two, one, physically speaking. I Corinthians
6:15,16 says, “Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then
take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid.
What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he,
shall be one flesh.” But to take that passage to mean that people are automatically
married to harlots, is not seen or supported by the examples of where that happened in
Scripture.
Amnon forcibly committed
immorality with his half-sister, Tamar. II Samuel 13:1-20 says, “And it came to pass
after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar;
and Amnon the son of David loved her. And Amnon was so vexed, that he fell sick for his
sister Tamar; for she was a virgin; and Amnon thought it hard for him to do any
thing to her. But Amnon had a friend, whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah
David's brother: and Jonadab was a very subtle man. And he said unto him, Why art
thou, being the king's son, lean from day to day? wilt thou not tell me? And
Amnon said unto him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister. And Jonadab said unto him,
Lay thee down on thy bed, and make thyself sick: and when thy father cometh to see thee,
say unto him, I pray thee, let my sister Tamar come, and give me meat, and dress the meat
in my sight, that I may see it, and eat it at her hand. So Amnon lay down,
and made himself sick: and when the king was come to see him, Amnon said unto the king, I
pray thee, let Tamar my sister come, and make me a couple of cakes in my sight, that I may
eat at her hand. Then David sent home to Tamar, saying, Go now to thy brother Amnon's
house, and dress him meat. So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house; and he was laid
down. And she took flour, and kneaded it, and made cakes in his sight, and did bake
the cakes. And she took a pan, and poured them out before him; but he refused to
eat. And Amnon said, Have out all men from me. And they went out every man from him. And
Amnon said unto Tamar, Bring the meat into the chamber, that I may eat of thine hand. And
Tamar took the cakes which she had made, and brought them into the chamber to Amnon
her brother. And when she had brought them unto him to eat, he took hold of her,
and said unto her, Come lie with me, my sister. And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do
not force me; for no such thing ought to be done in Israel: do not thou this folly. And I,
whither shall I cause my shame to go? and as for thee, thou shalt be as one of the fools
in Israel. Now therefore, I pray thee, speak unto the king; for he will not withhold me
from thee. Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she,
forced her, and lay with her. Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred
wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And
Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone. And she said unto him, There is no cause: this
evil in sending me away is greater than the other that thou didst unto me. But he
would not hearken unto her. Then he called his servant that ministered unto him, and said,
Put now this woman out from me, and bolt the door after her. And she had a
garment of divers colours upon her: for with such robes were the king's daughters that
were virgins apparelled. Then his servant brought her out, and bolted the door after
her. And Tamar put ashes on her head, and rent her garment of divers colours that was on
her, and laid her hand on her head, and went on crying. And Absalom her brother said unto
her, Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: he is thy
brother; regard not this thing. So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom's
house.” Amnon and Tamar are never referred to as “husband and wife” in the
Scriptures.
Exodus
22:16,17 says, “And if a man entice a maid that is not betrothed, and lie with her,
he shall surely endow her to be his wife. If her father utterly refuse to give her unto
him, he shall pay money according to the dowry of virgins.” In this case, the two
commit immorality. The Bible does NOT say that they are thus already married. What it says
is that THEY SHOULD NOW GET MARRIED. But even then, there is an exception: THE FATHER CAN
REFUSE TO GIVE HIS DAUGHTER TO SUCH A MAN. This means that they are not automatically
husband and wife.
There are
other examples, like David and Bathsheba. They committed immorality together. II Samuel
11:2-5 says, “And it came to pass in an eveningtide, that David arose from off his
bed, and walked upon the roof of the king's house: and from the roof he saw a woman
washing herself; and the woman was very beautiful to look upon. And David sent and
inquired after the woman. And one said, Is not this Bathsheba, the daughter
of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite? And David sent messengers, and took her; and she
came in unto him, and he lay with her; for she was purified from her uncleanness: and she
returned unto her house. And the woman conceived, and sent and told David, and said, I am
with child.” After they sinned, the Bible does not call David and Bathsheba
“husband and wife.” The Bible does clearly tell us when they did become husband
and wife. II Samuel 11:26,27 says, “And when the wife of Uriah heard that Uriah her
husband was dead, she mourned for her husband. And when the mourning was past, David sent
and fetched her to his house, and she became his wife, and bare him a son. But the thing
that David had done displeased the LORD.” It was AFTER Uriah died, that David and
Bathsheba actually got married.
Samson was
immoral with a woman in Judges 16:1-4, “Then went Samson to Gaza, and saw there an
harlot, and went in unto her. And it was told the Gazites, saying, Samson is come
hither. And they compassed him in, and laid wait for him all night in the gate of
the city, and were quiet all the night, saying, In the morning, when it is day, we shall
kill him. And Samson lay till midnight, and arose at midnight, and took the doors of the
gate of the city, and the two posts, and went away with them, bar and all, and put them
upon his shoulders, and carried them up to the top of an hill that is before
Hebron. And it came to pass afterward, that he loved a woman in the valley of Sorek, whose
name was Delilah.” He was immoral with an harlot, and then went on to get
involved with Delilah, but the Bible does not refer to any of those two women as being his
wife.
Having a
physical relationship does not automatically make two people married. Marriage is a formal
covenant entered into by two persons. Please see the Bible Courses on the subject of
“Marriage” on this same Web Site.
Previous Questions and Answers
Ask
A Question