Previous Questions and Answers
Can I Marry Her?
The question I wanted to ask was on marrying someone who believes in God,
but has not taken the step of fellowship, that is water baptism or have not answered to an
alter call. I have noticed that your site has condemned unequally yoked Christians
which in essence is really a bad idea.
However, this young lady and I have been going steady for a long time,
since college at a time that I knew the Word but was still young or believed that the
scripture of being unequally yoked was taken way out of context. In my mind, I had
the philosophy that although we were not married, we shared a bond that many people may
not have. Also since we decided to see each other exclusively, then that in itself
constitutes a Biblical marriage as far as I understood. She has never stood against my
will to serve God. She has always been there to me. Sometimes I
feel that she has walked a straighter path than myself because I know that I have hurt her
in the past by going out with other women while she has always stayed faithful. As a
Christian though, I know that forgiveness from God all as long as we are truly sorry and
we worship in Spirit. All and all what I am putting across that in my assessment she is
truly a good person, however weak in the Lord. She always has been interested in
learning from me about the Bible as I grew up in a stalwart Christian family where
my parents are highly noted in their assemble with various high degree responsibilities.
Due to this, I was raised up in the Word, so to speak. On the other hand, she was
raised up with less privileges of really knowing God as I have in a family that does not
portray Christian living and in some ways have a form of godliness. We got engaged
this summer as I believe that she truly loves me, more than any woman would really ever
and I believe that through God, she will come into full understanding.
As mentioned earlier, I have read your messages about being unequally
yoked. Doesn't the Bible however speak of not knowing if the unbelieving wife would come
to the Lord and also the sanctification that a believing husband brings to a household?
Are you trying to bring across the idea that if a believer marries an unbeliever is
salvation is shattered although when God comes we are neither given in marriage or married
but just one in the Lord? Really know, everybody knows how to discern God's will in their
life and I always felt that at no time in our relationship could I have ever broke apart
with her because I knew that this would truly mess her up as she really showed love
sticking with me through some low points in my life. There is so much more to Christianity
than marriage and sometimes I believe that in life each individual situation is
different. When God gave us the Bible, it was to open our understanding of Him
but I am almost positively certain that since then He has been speaking to many more
person showing them a more excellent way to life. Well, I just felt like sending an e-mail
to share some of my views on the matter.
Thank
you for your question.
You stated: "The question I wanted to ask was on marrying someone
who believes in God, but has not taken the step of fellowship, that is water baptism or
have not answered to an alter call. I have noticed that your site have condemned unequally
yoked Christians which in essence is really a bad idea."
I would encourage you to carefully go through the Bible Course on
Baptism on this same Web Site. Baptism does not save a person. A person cannot
be baptized until he or she is already saved. The Bible says, "Then Philip
opened his mouth, and began at the same scripture, and preached unto him Jesus. And
as they went on their way, they came unto a certain water: and the eunuch said, See, here
is water; WHAT DOTH HINDER ME TO BE BAPTIZED? And Philip said, IF THOU BELIEVEST
WITH ALL THINE HEART, THOU MAYEST. And he answered and said, I believe that Jesus Christ
is the Son of God. And he commanded the chariot to stand still: and they went down
both into the water, both Philip and the eunuch; and he baptized him. (Holy Bible, Acts
8:35-38). Baptism is not going to save your friend - the blood of Jesus Christ can
only do that. The Bible says, "the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us
from ALL SIN" (Holy Bible, I John 1:7).
Also, going forward at an altar call is not going to save a
person. It is a personal decision that must be made in a person's own heart, and
then that heart belief confessed with the mouth. The Bible says, "That if thou
shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God
hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth
unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. For the
scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed" (Holy Bible, Romans
10:9-11). When Peter was speaking to Cornelius and his relatives and friends, they
got saved right in their seats. The Bible says, "To him give all the prophets
witness, that through his name whosoever believeth in him shall receive remission of
sins. While Peter yet spake these words, the Holy Ghost fell on all them which heard
the word. And they of the circumcision which believed were astonished, as many as
came with Peter, because that on the Gentiles also was poured out the gift of the Holy
Ghost. For they heard them speak with tongues, and magnify God. Then answered
Peter, Can any man forbid water, that these should not be baptized, which have
received the Holy Ghost as well as we?" (Holy Bible, Acts 10:43-47). Many
people have gone forward to the altar, thinking that was all that it took to be saved, but
they do not even know what they did when they got up there. A person must repent,
and then call upon the Lord Jesus Christ to save him/her. The Bible says, "I
tell you, Nay: but, except ye repent, ye shall all likewise perish." (Holy Bible,
Luke 13:3). "For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be
saved." (Holy Bible, Romans 10:13).
It is not just this site that clearly condemns a saved person marrying
an unsaved person, it is God's Holy Word that condemns such a practice. The Bible
says, "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath
righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And
what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an
infidel? And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple
of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be
their God, and they shall be my people. Wherefore come out from among them, and be
ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive
you, And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the
Lord Almighty." (Holy Bible, II Corinthians 6:14-18).
Widows are given permission to marry if their mates have died, and the
other person is qualified to marry. Notice one of the qualifications, "The wife
is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at
liberty to be married to whom she will; ONLY IN THE LORD" (I Corinthians 7:39).
A widow is told to only marry another saved person.
If you marry an unsaved person, expect a miserable life from your
"father-in-law." For who is your unsaved mate's "father?"
The Bible clearly tells you in John 8:44, "Ye are of YOUR FATHER THE DEVIL, and the
lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in
the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his
own: for he is a liar, and the father of it." The devil cannot take away your
salvation, but he can sure make your life miserable, if you go ahead and marry one of his
children.
No matter how long you have known this young lady, you are not
"one" with her as husband and wife until you are married. The Bible says,
"What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder" (Holy Bible,
Mark 10:9). Any immoral relationship before marriage does not make you "husband
and wife," in God's eyes, but makes you "whoremongers." The Bible
says, "Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and
adulterers God will judge" (Hebrews 13:4).
You stated, "Doesn't the Bible however speak of not knowing if the
unbelieving wife would come to the Lord and also the sanctification that a believing
husband brings to a household?"
That does not apply to you, because you are not married yet. If a
person is already married to an unsaved person, then they are commanded not to leave that
person, because they do not know but what that mate might one day get saved. But if
you knowingly marry an unsaved person, then you are disobeying God's Word, and can expect
judgment to fall upon you for your disobedience.
Your best chance to ever see her saved is right now. If she sees
that Jesus is truly first in your life, and that you would be willing to obey Him, even if
it means losing her. But on the other hand, if you go ahead and marry her, and then
start to witness to her and try to see her saved, expect her anger to come out in your
marriage. For she will see you as a deceiver, if you would accept her as she is
right now, and then try and convert her after you are married. She needs to know the
truth - now.
Get a King James Bible, and get on a schedule to read it through at
least once a year. You also need to go through the Salvation Bible Course on this
same Web Site, and make sure that you understand what salvation really is.
This question was answered for: